.::still blinking::.

I am home from my trip.

I have felt sick since we got out of the ocean yesterday at five. We went snorkeling and I got out and was so hungry I felt pregnant. Pregnant hungry is an entirely different animal than not pregnant hungry. Do you know what I mean? I have felt like that ever since. When our plane landed in Salt Lake I was seriously pondering throwing up. And for some reason we were stuck in the air because one of the run ways was not being used. So we were just circling in what they called a holding bin. I kept praying, please help me not throw up on the plane. Please let me make it to the airport bathroom. I still feel this way and I cannot get myself to eat anything except Pero and M&Ms. jj is probably getting sick of me whining about my current state of upset stomach.

You know another thing that is sick. As I typed upset stomach, I thought of all those commercials where they have songs and dances for upset stomachs and diarrhea. Those are really kind of perverse, and I would know. Obviously. But it seems to me you would just say it and not come up with some catching jingle about it.

For instance. I cannot remember what the medicine is or what it is used for, but a while ago I needed it because I remembered the symptoms that it treated and that it talked about aisle five. And that is all that I could remember. Aisle five. That did not help me at all. Aisle five. What the heck could it be? I don’t remember. So I just found something that said it would work for my symptoms and left. It seems if they wanted you to remember what the medicine was they would say the symptoms and the name of the medicine a lot.

And then there is the stuff like Cialis. For erectile disfunction. With side effects of, well, you have heard the commericals. I don’t know of any guy that would go to the doctor for that side effect. It seems more likely that they would use it as a weapon of mass distruction.

jj just informed me that Sudafed is on Aisle Five. And also they have commercials for all these medicines with five minute long lists of side effects. I think that I would rather deal with the problem than have the side effects. And the longer they list the side effects the longer you are thinking, are you kidding me? This is supposed to help me feel better.

And the reason I am thinking medicine is because I could really use something to calm my stomach. And I might even take bleeding from the eyes as a side effect.

This is how it really looked. It was amazing. A streak of red across the sky.

Who are these people? I don’t know. But they were seriously weird and deserving of a nasty comment I thought. I dared jj to yell “Make love to the camera!” He would not do it and I was to chicken. They were sitting at this gorgeous sunset taking stupid pictures of each other. Doesn’t she look totally natural?

Happy 30th jj! We have known each other for six years.

jj, who is not really named jj, has been tagged by someone as an International Man of Mystery. He is part of the IMM. Everytime we travel anywhere, he is stopped a little longer, well a lot longer than most. They have to call someone and look shifty eyed at him the entire time they are discussing him. He is never actually stopped, he always gets to pass go. But is always flagged.

jj’s name is not jj, nor is it jage as I call him on occasion. He has a common name that he shares with our son and his father and a man in Morgan, Utah. Luckily jj has incredible credit because he shares his name with these men and we cannot seem to get them off his credit. I guess he also shares his name with a questionable person whom they are not sure if they want to travel. jj said that when he came home from his service for the church that he had a warrant out for his arrest in Alabama because of someone with the same name. I guess this is something that we will always deal with.

Every time, at every stop, we have to call and make sure jj is not a bad man with bad thoughts. I guess they think that he is passable. They should ask me and I would tell them that he is a lethal man of mystery.

I hate the guy on the airplane who has to talk really loud all the way to wherever you are going. This particular specimen talked about smoking for a really long time. Who knew it was so terribly interesting. I also hate paying $3.50 for an apple at the airport. But we only had an hour of sleep last night so I did not take snacks for the trip into consideration.

We had no time for sleep. We took Gentry dressed as a chicken to jj’s work party. I must say that I think his costume and his little self were so cute. We then drove him up to Logan and there was traffic, the trip that usually is two hours was three. We only stayed for about an hour and then drove home. But we had not packed and had to get it all done before we had to leave for the airport at 4 (FOUR?!? Who planned that?) in the morning.

fortunately we missed Halloween. Making cute costumes, very fun. Giving candy to beggars, kind of fun. Begging for candy, not my bag baby.

As we took off from California we saw several large ships at sea and at harbor. They were enormous. Like floating cities. We saw the Bay Bridge and the Golden Gate Bridge.

We have been flying over the ocean for 4 hours. The vast expanse of this world amazes me. I want to see so much and do so much. I have experienced so little. I am excited.

The good news is that I am going to Hawaii on Wednesday. I can hardly wait!

I have about a million things to do including giving myself a bikini wax and waxing jj’s back. I know you wanted to know. It really is one of my favorite activities though. I also need to go find the perfect color of toe nail polish and get my piggies sparkling and happy and remove any hair on them as well. And while we are on the subject of hair removal, I bleached my mustache the other day, but now I need to wax that and between my eyebrows as well, and maybe between jj’s. I guess that is not a maybe, it always needs to be waxed there, it is just whether I can talk him into it or not. I bet you didn’t know I was so hairy, or rather you didn’t want to know. That is probably more correct.

I have started applying my fake tan and I am not streaked yet. Hopefully that will not happen for me. I am trying not to get tan or burned any more. All of jj’s family has skin cancer. I know that is not hereditary for me, but I don’t want to get it. But the damage is probably already done. But I am doing all that I can now to try not to get. Hopefully it will be enough. I hate when I get burned.

So I will not be posting for a weekish. I may come up with something brilliant to say tomorrow. You never know when genius will strike.

But I will be taking pictures of our tropical retreat. It is in celebration of our 5th year of marriage and also jj’s birthday. He is turning 30 on the 2nd.

Wish us luck and no sunburns. And don’t burn our house down while we are gone.

A person is not defined by the situation they came from unless they let it be the deciding factor. Who wants to be defined by their sorrow? I would rather be characterized by my victories. I need to stop bringing up my challenges and start talking about what I am good at. There actually are things that I am good at and if I start focusing on those then maybe I will start feeling good about me.

And other peoples opinions will just melt into oblivion.

Turtle sketches for another logo that I am working on. By the way, what does yuppie mean? I am looking it up on the internet and I don’t think that I am getting the right idea.

The most exciting thing of late is that jj has gotten his thumb posted in someone else’s blog. He is so proud of his Wii scouting abilities, he is sure he is getting one of these when they are released. We will see.

As for me, I am feeling incredibly boring or bored rather. I have tons or projects that I am working on and need to finish, but I have no will power to work to speak of. I don’t know what my problem is. I wish that I could sleep all day, but I do not have time for such obvious waste of time. However, watching Martha Stewart, that would not count as a waste of time, right?

I am so tired of playing with blocks and coloring. But that is pretty much what Gentry wants to do all the time and eat m&m’s. But who can blame him for that, it could be rated up there with one of my top things to do. I am just bored. I need to get out more or something. I need to find my purpose. Sorry if this is a downer for those of you that are thinking about becoming full time mothers. It really starts to wear on you.

I have been wondering lately, how many women could have changed the world if they would have or could have pursued something other than motherhood. And besides that what about all the people in 3rd world countries that are stuck in their situation. They could be geniuses and could have changed the world if they would have been born to someone else, or gotten their hands on some money or been born in a different country.

What is this oppression? What am I supposed to be doing that I am not. What is my big idea that could change not only my life, but those around me. I want to be more than I am.

I checked out from the library Carmen Electras Advanced Aerobic Striptease. Mostly out of curiosity of seeing what kind of work out this could possibly be. It isn’t. I don’t think you could get a work out from the six 5-minute clips of non-exercise that mostly repeat themselves and go incredibly slow. I was hoping for some sexy work out, none found here unfortunately.

I guess the workout comes from later, after you have performed it for your husband.

Also, did you know that you and your 40-year old neighbor could join a dance class. I am not talking like waltz and tango. I am talking about like the drill team at high school. My neighbor wants me to join with her, I cannot think of anything less appealing. Oh, wait, yes I can. But not a lot of things.

For instance, I never wanted to be in those when I was in high school. And now that I could be performing right after my neighbors daughter, that makes it even less appealing.

But there was the few months while I was pregnant that I went to Jazzercise. Now that is an experience. I am so uncoordinated. I cannot get dance moves down, ever. The lady that taught these classes would yell at me because while everyone else was turning right I was always turning left or pumping my arms the wrong way. During the sexy dance stuff I would just do jumping jacks or something. I hate all the extra crap. I just want to get in, work HARD, and get out of there and then be sore from the good work out that I put in. I rarely would even sweat in that class and I was trying hard to sweat. So I quit and joined Xcel Spa & Fitness. That was good, but still I hated going to the classes and trying to learn the moves. So I eventually quit doing that also and just walking on the treadmill during CSI:Blanding, or whatever was on.

There came a time while pregnant that I was walking on the treadmill and sneezed. At that moment I lost a little bladder control and leaked a little pee. Nobody knew, but I booked it to the bathroom and made sure that I did not do that again. I think after that I did not work out much. I was so big though that I was having a hard time walking anyway. The most exercise that I wanted to be doing was getting off the couch to find the remote or a bag of cheetos.

Go to this website for delicious popcorn. I ordered mine and I cannot wait for it to come. You just have to pay for the shipping. You have to order before the end of October.