.::still blinking::.

Yesterday in church, we were discussing what is appropriate to wear to church. One of the young women raised her hand and said, “Nothing above the knee and nothing below (insert something, I cannot remember what she said).” Then she maliciously looked over at one of the other girls who had a shorter skirt on and grinned to herself about her all-knowing goodness. Self-righteous little girl. I thought, I wonder what other lovely doctrine you have been taught.

Then today I realized why this has bugged me so much. She is the embodiment of me at that age. I was the most self-righteous child, and I learned it from home. That’s right the home what was all full of itself with no actual content, love, or honesty. The home that took all blame and placed it outward on the world and taught me what everyone else was doing wrong, because Heaven forbid we actually look inward and discover that we are not perfect.

I remember fighting with a girl in my young women’s class about whether people who had gone on missions were better than those who had not. The girl said that a lot of her brothers had not gone on missions and they were still good people. I argued that people who had gone on missions were better because they were more committed to the Lord and it would show up in all areas of their lives. Oh, what an ass I am. I hate looking back and remembering doing such things and unfortunately that was not the only time.

I am better now, or at least working on being better. I hope that I can teach my children to love all people and to look inward and fix things in themselves to make them better people. I also hope that maybe I can influence Miss Know-it-all.