rest
I was put on strict bed rest on Thursday. Like don’t get out of bed. Don’t go downstairs. Don’t walk more than the length of a block. Don’t stand for more than 30 minutes. I was told to basically sit still for a really long time.
Gentry’s pregnancy was not like this. It was kind of difficult. But nothing like this and I had had nothing to compare it to before that.
This pregnancy. Makes me question my strength as a person. I know you are all here to support and help me through this. But I used to run marathons. I used to swim for hours. I used to sweat so hard during workouts that there was a puddle around me. I used to be strong. It is hard to give up that part of me, even for a short amount of time.
I was reading my cousin Sarah’s blog today. She has a link to this video and the following quote:
“Imagine yourself as a living house. God comes in to rebuild that house. At first, perhaps, you can understand what He is doing. He is getting the drains right and stopping the leaks in the roof and so on: you knew that those jobs needed doing, and so you are not surprised. But presently, He starts knocking the house about in a way that hurts abominably and does not seem to make sense. What on earth is He up to? The explanation is that He is building quite a different house from the one you thought of — throwing out a new wing here, putting on an extra floor there, running up towers, making courtyards. You thought you were going to be made into a decent little cottage: but He is building a palace.” -C.S. Lewis, Mere Christianity
I was listening and reading the quote at the same time. I could feel myself running again. I could see it in my mind. I could feel the rhythm of it. I could feel the cool breeze of the evening whipping past me. So maybe I need this time to be humbled and tried. I hope things will be better than I could have imagined.
May 30th, 2009 at 10:13 pm
Why the bed rest? Boo! I guess this is where the Disneyland thoughts come in handy, huh?
May 31st, 2009 at 7:30 am
I have been bleeding for three weeks, since t-ball. It is called a sbchronic hemorrage, and was very small to begin with. They told me to take it easy, which I did but it didn’t go away. So I went in on Thursday for another ultra-sound. The tear had gotten much bigger (7cm) and they scared me and told me not to do anything or I might put this pregnancy at risk.
Gentry is in Logan for a week, hopefully if I lie around enough it will get better and I can get back to life as usual.
May 31st, 2009 at 6:54 pm
I remember the first (out of three) times i had Chicken pox. I was about 6. My uncle who is 3 years older than me, with some help from my aunt kept coming into my room and putting on puppet shows. They were silly but helped pass the time. I remember even then thinking how sweet and selfless it was for him/them to do that for me. I wish I were close enough to come put on puppet shows for you. Or the metaphoric puppet show, anyway. This too will pass. 🙂
June 1st, 2009 at 6:33 pm
I think that rest is a good thing. even better when it is forced – and we have to obey doctors orders and really do it.
I long for rest. Should have taken more of an opportunity for it a couple of weeks ago when I had all the help in the world.
June 2nd, 2009 at 9:13 pm
I long for rest too. If you need anyone to visit with while you rest don’t hesitate to call or email. I think I could be good at resting.
June 3rd, 2009 at 11:23 am
Scary. BUT now is the perfect time to knock out a few novels. Have you read any of the Fablehaven books?