.::still blinking::.

Lately, Gentry has picked up a lot of slang and not so slang words. They are rather funny.

For instance, if you ask him if he is coloring, he will answer, “Sure.” He uses “sure” in place of “yes” almost always. Are you watching Monsters? Sure. Did you poop? Sure. Is that your elbow? Sure.

He also says “gosh” all the time. When he is flustered from laughing he will say it. It sounds a lot like when Goofy says it with a funny voice inflection. Kind of a “Gorsh.” Or if he is excited about something like a bandaid on his finger, “Gorsh.” Or if we get a new book from the library, “Gorsh.”

He picked up “dang it” yesterday. Marni, jj’s sister, came down and said it a couple of times I guess. He has been saying it ever since. “Dang it, more juice. Now!” That is actual phrasing. “Color, dang it.” How does he know when to say all this stuff? I don’t know. Crazy kid.

We have been asking him to say “please” instead of “now!” “Salsa, now!” Can you say please? In the most angelic voice he will say “pleeeeeease.” It is very sing-song when he says it and it melts my heart. “Hold you, please.” Which translated means, hold me. If he is asking please we are so much more likely to give in.

He also has picked up “stupid.” I didn’t think that I said this that much, but he must have picked it up the couple of times that I have said it. He says it to get a rise out of me, and it does. Very smart kid, if you ask me.

We have a little photo album that we take to church with us. It has pictures of us and his grandparents and him in it. All the pictures of him as a baby he says are baby josh. All babies that we pass in the store a baby josh. Basically, all babies are baby josh. Cute.

I have been debating whether or not to share this, but I figure that a bunch of you are in for it in a short while anyway. So here goes.

A couple days ago Gentry pooped in the tub. I know this is not ground breaking or anything and he has done it before, but he has been so funny about it ever since.

When we saw him sitting in the tub with a great big poop we immediatly removed him and went and decontaminated him in the other bathtub. Gentry was so sad about it. It was probably the way that we acted that brought on the enormous melt down that followed the event. For a little while he would not lie down in my tub so that I could properly lather, rinse, repeat. Then when he finally did lie down, and I washed him, he would not get back up. He wanted to stay in the tub. I was not in the mood to see if he had any other suprise to share. So I got him out.

While I was bathing Gentry, jj began the wash and sterilization of the tub that had just been defecated in. He filled the bathroom sink with clorox and water and started washing all the toys that were in the the tub at the same moment. He then got out the Ajax and washed the tub. He was very efficient and thorough. He deserves a reward. I know just what he would like.

The next day every person that I talked to Gentry had to interrupt and say, “Pooped! Tub!” All the people would smile and then look at me quizzically. I would tell them that he had pooped in the tub and that he was obviously very proud of the fact. It was semi-mortifying to discuss the bowel movements of my son with my mothers coworkers, including but not limited to, the Mayor of Herriman. Who is very understanding, having raised five children himself. I just like to pretend that I am civilized and that such disturbances never happen in my life.

He was still talking about it today when I gave him a bath. He got in the tub and said happily, “Pooped! Tub!” I hoped he was stating fact and not warning of things to come. Here’s to the ghost of things to come.

Today was a fun day. The boy was fun, he entertained himself a little bit, giving me bits of time to myself. I was able to clean the kitchen and keep the house clean. He even took a three hour nap. An enormous rarity. He usually takes like an hour nap if that. The day went fast, it was a sharp contrast to yesterday.

It started off well, and quickly dwindled. We ate breakfast and I tried to clean up the kitchen. I was trying to clean off the counter and make some tea and put pictures into an album. The boy came over and knocked over my grande cup of tea on the pictures. I then had to lie them all out over all the surfaces of the kitchen hoping that they would not turn purple or lose their color. I was then forced to give up my hopes of cleaning the kitchen.

We then went upstairs to clean the bathroom, I took the broom with me. Things were going pretty well, I would give him a clorox wet wipe so he could do what I was doing. But he got bored with that pretty quickly and decided to play with the broom, which he started wielding as an s-word. It was funny for the first hit, the second infuriated me, the third hit I took it away from him and all hell broke loose.

He pretty much blubbered for the entire rest of the day. He would not remove himself from my thigh, if he could have implanted himself in my leg he would have. There was not escaping the child. That was pretty much the end of the happiness yesterday. I won’t endlessly describe the rest of the day, mostly because I seem to have blocked it from my memory.

How can these days, when we do basically the same thing everyday and all day, be so starkly different? How do the moods of a 23 month old child dictate the direction of a day?

I cannot help myself. I have to get my daily fix of this website, sometimes, well usually more than once or twice a day. I am addicted to Hollywood smut.

Yesterday was the first day of General Conference. In celebration we went to the zoo. Hogle Zoo. There is no point trying to watch conference with a small child with no attention span. The zoo is a lot nicer than it used to be, which is nice. But it felt a lot smaller also. I remember it being huge. Of course I was a lot shorter when I used to go all the time.

Gentry loved it though. He has been talking about it all day yesterday and today. We will ask him what he saw there. Animals? Snakes? ssssssssssssss. Turtle? Zebra? Mice? Big Mice? Spider? Ducks? I have added the question marks because that is how he says it. Like it is a question, but really he is just excited about it and that is how he adds the emphasis. Elephants? We watched and elephant show and we were standing about 5-10 feet away from the elephant and then they had the elephant go over to another part of the arena. Gentry yelled, “Elephant come back!”

jj just walked in and is doing a sexy dance behind me.

Yesterday when we were saying prayers with Gentry, he was sitting on my lap. About half way through the prayer he turned around and touched my eye. It scared me and I jumped. He started laughing and then I started laughing also. jj just kept on with the prayer and then when he was finished me made us both sit in the corner.

My baby came home today! He is so cute and talking up a storm. You all should come and see. I want to kiss his little squishy face off.

Also, who doesn’t love Tiffany & Co. A couple of the girls that I worked with this past week had necklaces from there.

I like this one and this one.

But honestly, who could resist a stack of these on there hand?

Click on “Create Stacks of Celebration Rings.”

I would love my left and right hand ring fingers to be filled with these.

Cuke kids on the sand piles at my family reunion. Wouldn’t it be funny if they were all really a bunch of cucumbers in clothing.

Genty refused to keep his feet buried.

I got a little irritated with all the older kids throwing sand and eventually I turned into the safety patrol. I would take away toys and almost got to the point of making kids have timeouts.

There was one little girl who spit in my sister Kateka’s face. We went and told her dad and he was like, oh, she is just at that age. And laughed. What? No wonder she is part devil, her dad is completely devil. There is no appropriate age for spitting.

Next year when I go back and spend the entire time sitting on the sand, “diggin.” That is how Gentry says it. I am going to kick kids off the sand pile for being brats. I don’t care if their parents aren’t going to discipline them, I am going to let them know that there is someone in charge here and I am going to make kids be nice. There will be, “NO THROWING SAND ON THE SANDPILE!”

Now sit down and be nice you little terd.

Isn’t jj hilarious? He took this picture.

A lot of times I get answers to questions I have in my dreams. Maybe not answers, but just thoughts that I need to put into place in my life.

I don’t remember what I was dreaming one time, but I remember that Gentry was there and someone said to me or I just thought, “He is a person too.” That really struck me. I don’t think of him as a person, he seems more like a really needy extension of myself. But he is a person with thoughts and feelings and valid needs.

Today, Gentry and I were taking a bath together. We also had a bowl of raisins that he was washing in the bath water and eating. I know, way gross. Sometimes it is not worth the fight. I had the thought again. He is a person too. I need to stop ignoring him, I need to embrace him as the little guy that he is.

It is my responsibility to raise him in a good and honorable way. I am not sure what way that is, I don’t think that I was raised in the way that I want him to be raised. I want him to feel loved no matter what or who he is. I think the most important thing is to be honest with yourself and just be who you are. If you are honest with yourself, you will be honest with others.

He is my little guy. I like him, no matter what.

Apparently I need to find a new place for my make-up. Or I could put it in a steel box with three pad locks on it. That might deture him for about three weeks.

This is not a black eye. He found my 12 hour lip stick and it did as it promised, it stayed with us all day.

Last night, while I was at young women’s, Gentry started puking like crazy. Luckily, he has a great dad who took care of him during the ordeal until I got home so that we could tag team the messes that were being created.

I was astounded by the way this sick little boy brought out ultimate love and concern. This was the same little boy that earlier in the day I had been yelling at to get back here and be quiet. As he was lying on the floor, holding his stomach, pail and not moving and trying to blink away sleep, I wanted to crawl into his little body and take away the sickness that he was feeling so that he did not have to.

We finally cleaned him up and his room up to an acceptable manner, and left him to go to sleep in his crib. But seconds after we closed his bedroom door he was throwing up again. We went back in and just stripped him down to a diaper and put new blankets under him and a fleece blanket over him. This time, I sat next to his bedroom door and read magazines for about an hour then I went and got the twin mattress out of the office and put it on the floor in his room. I slept in his room and everytime he squeaked, coughed or sneezed, I was up and out of bed in a flash. I would make sure that he was still covered by the warm fleece blanket and that he was not about to throw up again.

He has not thrown up since, and I think that he is ok now. I think that he got sick from drinking the Splash Pool water. Which I did not recommend, but he does not do what I tell him to do. He does what he wants.

I am glad to have a husband that will take care of my baby and am glad to have a son that helps me understand what love is really about.

Yesterday I dropped Gentry off at Hill Air Force Base, that is where jj’s dad works and he then took him up to Logan to stay with jj’s parent for week. It made me sad and I cried on the way home.

I have left him before and it did not bother me, but this time, I cried. The first time I was stuck in my hormonal, just had quit breastfeeding stupor. I could not have been more happy to get away from him, after having suckled him for a year.

This time, my hormones have mellowed, my hair has grown back and he has enlightened my life. I finally feel the amazing feeling of love that people talk about with their children. I have yearned for that so much. Not because he has changed so much, although he has, but because I have. The insanity has left my blood stream and I am feeling whole again. I hope that I can feel like this from now on.